mocha

the other day, i went to a coffee shop and ordered a mocha (cost: 20 yuan, or about $2.50). after about 20 minutes, the waitress gave me a small cup of black coffee, a pitcher of cream, and a packet of sugar. i turned to her and said, "i'm sorry, there must be a mistake. i ordered a mocha." she told me. "oh, this is a mocha." i tasted it and sure enough, it tasted like mediocre black coffee, so i turned back to her and told her that it definitely was not a mocha. she took it back up and came back about two minutes later with the same cup of coffee. she told me that she asked the woman and it was a mocha. i told her that usually a mocha was made with chocolate and steamed milk. she said, "well, our mochas don't have chocolate in them. we can add chocolate powder to your mocha if you want" i asked her what the difference was between the mocha and a regular cup of coffee (besides the price, of course. she said to me, "the mocha is made with mocha beans, of course." then she said, "our mocha is hand made, and the regular coffee is machine made." at that point it i decided it was futile to argue, i just made a mental note never to go back to that coffee place again.
that's one of the surreal things about china, is that most people who make or sell western products really have no clue what the names mean, and so there's sort of an orwellian (or as some people might say, postmodern) redefining of products. i have had people with completely straight faces insist that a margarita was a strawberry daiquiri and that a piece of toast with spam on it was pizza. there's no point in arguing, or pointing out that it isn't the case, because assumptions that are commonly held about what the definition of something like a mocha or pizza or a cocktail just simply don't exist. though maybe if a chinese person went to some chinese restaurants in america they might feel the same way.

also as an update, i am completely recovered now.